Recommendations, Informed Consent, and the Role of an IBCLC
- Estelle Fraisse
- Oct 30
- 2 min read
Today, I received a message from someone expecting a baby in a couple of weeks. She told me she didn’t plan to breastfeed, but wanted to know how she could nurse her baby for the first day and then stop safely. She also mentioned she felt this might go against my recommendations.
Let me be clear: I support all families and all choices.
My recommendation is always the same—to make an informed decision after receiving the most accurate, up-to-date information available. I’m not here to push, convince, or pressure anyone. You are in charge of your family, not me. I don’t know what’s best for you—only you do.
As a lactation consultant, my role is to support families where they are, not where my own convictions are—or what I would have done with my own children. I offer information, options, and realistic expectations that match each family’s goals and resources.
Would it be shocking to hear a surgeon say to a patient:
“I know your knee is painful, and you’re a good candidate for a knee replacement. Here’s what the surgery involves, and here are the risks and benefits.”
Then imagine the patient replies:
“I understand, Doctor, but I’m the primary caregiver for my spouse with Alzheimer’s, and I don’t have the resources to recover from surgery right now.”
Would that be shocking? Of course not. The surgeon explains, provides information, and leaves space for the person to make a decision. That patient now has a choice.
What would be concerning is the opposite scenario:
“Okay, you need a new knee. Let’s schedule it for December 10th at 8 a.m.”
In that case, there’s pressure, not choice. Nobody looked at the full picture.
Lactation care is no different. A lactation consultant must look at the whole family—their dynamics, their reality, their choices, and what is or isn’t doable.
So yes, I help people who choose not to breastfeed. That’s part of my job, as long as the decision is well informed.
And “well informed” is a complex concept. Marketing often plays with emotions, guilt, and fear—creating pressure and “fake needs.” That’s a topic I’ll save for another article.
But if there’s one thing I hope you remember from this:✨ I support you, no matter your choices.✨ I’m not here only for the 100% breastfeeding goal.✨ My goal is that you make decisions you feel confident about—so that later, there are no regrets, only peace with the path you chose.
Have a wonderful day
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